Happy Sunday Everyone-
I was going to start by saying I haven’t been coached, or been a coach, in 3 plus years, but the reality is I’ve had many of friends coach me along the way, informally. With that said-I went off the beaten path this year and hired someone outside of the industry to coach me, Robin Sharma. I’ve written about him a few times, he holds one of my favorite quotes of all time, actually its from his dad; “When you were born, you cried while the world rejoiced. Live your life in such a way that when you die, the world cries, while you rejoice.” If you let that sit for a few minutes, its magical.
I was rewatching the January coaching call and he said something that hit me; “don’t prove value to people who don’t value you”. I’m not sure why those words hit so hard but I’ve been thinking about them since he said it. The concept is liberating. I’d like to say I’m above it but I’m not. How many times in our work do we try to attract the unattractable. How many times do I find the person that I have nothing in common with, I share none of the same values, yet that’s the person that I’m going to try to forge a relationship with? and then I get frustrated or question myself when they don’t see my value, it doesn’t make sense. Stop.
Do your best, be true to yourself, to your values, trust the people who care about you and their feedback, and then go about being the best you can be. I’m beginning to realize at 51 that “flow” isn’t some mystical experience, it happens when I’m serving people who actually appreciate what I bring to the table. I go back to the example of talking to a room of 20 people. I find the one person in the room who doesn’t want to be there and focus on them, vs. the 19 people who want to be there. Why? This concept is a reminder of not focusing on the one person I’m trying to convert but instead how to serve the 19 people exceptionally well.
The more we try to prove our value, the more diluted it becomes. I’d rather invest where it’s welcome and build something meaningful with the people who are already on board.
Go U.S. Men’s Hockey!!