Happy Sunday Everyone:
The saying of “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear” is alive and well. Dave Savage has suggested me writing out my code for a few years. Upon calling him for some advice, he pushed me a little harder to get started last week, and I did. HIs code AKA “The Savage Code” is something that started off as a letter to his son after college graduation and has turned into much more. Dave’s words on your code: “A lifetime of beliefs, values, principals, philosophies, and mantras that guide your life”.
I’m at the 5-yard line of this process but Dave suggested taking 15 minutes on documenting my codes, then going back and writing out what those codes mean. In my brief efforts in doing this, I’m finding more intention in my thought process rolling through the day. We all might say “i know by beliefs and values” just because, but being intentional to define what those are in writing is different. I just heard a friend say the other day “inspect what you expect”. We should inspect what we expect of ourselves. Reviewing this living/breathing document often will do that for us.
I’ve listed my first draft below, in no particular order at this point. In bold are my codes so far with what they mean behind it. If this is interesting to you, I’ve also attached at the bottom Dave’s instructions and a FB group he started.
- Be the Buffalo-Running toward anything that is good and/or hard is always the right answer. Sitting stagnant, without a compass, without a north star, will likely lead to a dead end.
- The Golden Rule-treat people how I want to be treated. Truthful, caring, and honest, never drama, never passive aggressive behavior.
- You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with most. Be aware of who you choose to spend time with. It will likely be more than 5 people but be aware of who you’re receiving council from. I love the concept of “If I’m not interested in your opinion/advice, why am I attaching energy to how you feel about me, good or bad”.
- Breathe life into everyone I interact with. This is my own personal mission statement on life. We can be an asset in deep love and conversation, and we can be an asset in saying hello to a stranger. 24/7 we are being an asset or a liability to ourselves and those around us. An asset breathes life into people.
- Reverse the lens. It’s the clearest path to empathy. To understand and appreciate someone else’s perspective, whether you agree with it or not, is listening without words. It neutralizes heaviness. It allows you to come to a conversation with an open mind.
- Honor the ones we’ve lost by loving the way we live. This is purely for Tom Marckwardt but its universal for everyone we’ve lost who we loved, respected, and admired. If you think of the people, you’ve lost who you love, respect, and admire, every one of them would ask you to honor their lives through you living yours. It’s a beacon.
- Doing the right thing is always the right thing to do. I have never done the right thing and regretted it, and I’ve never done the wrong thing and not. This is wisdom and it acts like a muscle.
- Faith in God is the only way to finding a peace that surpasses all understanding. We live in some form of chaos when it’s about us. We find massive peace in those moments when we realize we’re not in control. Understanding this is a lifelong pursuit, and nothing is more beneficial to our well-being.
- Be curious about others, ask more questions than you give answers. Interested vs. interesting.
- Live with the end in mind. There is no better filter than your death bed as the final outcome. If we ran every thought through “is this going to matter when I’m on my death bed” it creates a lens as to what is important and what is not.
- I’ve never wished I’d drank more the night before and I’ve never wished I hadn’t worked out, that tells you something. Our bodies are truly our temples. This is as important for mental clarity as it is physical.
- Delayed gratification always trumps instant gratification. Instant gratification is impulsive and often out of alignment with what is good. Delayed gratification is a disciplined decisioning based on being intentional in living a good life. It’s all encompassing.
- Work on you to appreciate you, not to be critical of you. Studying how we operate and why we operate the way we do is interesting. We’re all works in progress, and we should celebrate every discovery.
- Why not me. The man in the arena. Are you choosing to be the man in the arena or the spectator? The man in the arena say’s “why not me” the spectator says, “not me”.
- Consider often the gain vs. the gap. Keeping focused on the gratitude of everything along the way that has led up to this moment trumps considering where you’ve fallen short and what milestones have been missed.
- Honor my word to myself– Nothing is more important for self-confidence than doing what you tell yourself you’re going to do. It also keeps you honest. Don’t sign up for what you’re not committed to but do everything you are committed to. Less is more.
- Trust people-you can’t understand how good someone truly is without fully trusting them. That trust is what creates love. You’ll get burned a few times along the way but it’s worth it.
I understand not everyone is going to take me up on this, just as I didn’t with Dave for a few years. The ones that do will be glad for it, I promise.
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